If trauma is not processed in a healthy manner…the abused can very easily become the abuser.
A very good example of that would be how Child Molesters are more often than not molested as children themselves.
Emotionally abusive people are also a direct product and a perfect example of the abused becoming abusive.
When people experience trauma as children or even as an adult…our inner psyche/child gets wounded and fearful…and we can become triggered very easily.
If we are not made aware of this fearful part of us…the fearful child inside of us takes over our subconscious and conscious world.
Emotionally abusive people have allowed their fearful inner child to run the show.
You cannot hand your car keys to a child and expect them to not crash your car…same concept.
We all have endured trauma in one way or another…deaths, sickness, accidents, divorces, wars etc are all traumatic events that leave residual effects on our psyche…but not EVERYONE chooses to abuse the people we experience.
Emotional abusers have the emotional maturity and integrity of a toddler but inflict harm like an adult…THAT is a very dangerous combination.
It’s like handing a weapon to a toddler…and hoping for the best.
Adults operating from primal instincts…fear, lust, greed, jealousy…behave like a wounded animal…if provoked they will bite…because of the trauma that is triggered in them.
By definition….the 4 primal instincts speak of the four Fs which are said to be the four basic and most primal drives that animals including humans are evolutionarily adapted to have, follow, and achieve: fighting, fleeing, feeding and fornicating.
If left to the repercussions of our own trauma and experiences…we would ALL abuse others.
THAT’S what creates the difference between YOU and a person who perpetuates abuse…we don’t abuse…we recognize that wounded part of our soul, we learn and we heal.
At least…thats the plan…or our fearful inner child will run the show…that we call our life.
Children are not given the responsibility to run our lives…for good reason.
