Living My New Reality
Narcissists are not born that way...they are created through their traumas...just like ALL of us...just like any other criminals...and perpetuated by their own deviant behaviors...NOT the same as us. There is a fine line and a few traits that separates us from being a thief or any kind of trickster or criminal. Lack of integrity, level of laziness and desperation...plus
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Holding space.....By definition...means being physically, mentally, and emotionally present for someone. It means putting your focus on someone to support them as they feel their feelings. An important aspect of holding space is managing judgment while you are present.Caveat:You don't wait around and hold space for people to 'behave better'...you leave...and let them learn to behave better on their own
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From a distance....Dealing with a Narcissist is like being on a bipolar roller-coaster ride.Up and down, in and out, back and forth, to and fro...Sometimes, it's like dealing with unpredictable inclement weather...hot and cold, freeze and defrost...or lots of blowing of hot air...like a tornado. Sometimes, it's like a wishy washy laundry spin cycle...tumble dry...banging your head in the dryer...like
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Mirror Mirror on the Wall.... Once you mirror back to the Narcissist their behaviors...Game OVER!Once you call them out on their repugnant behaviors...Game OVER!Once you call a Narcissist out...You get called crazy!(Text book Narcissist)The good news...There's help for being 'crazy'...There's absolutely no help for being a Narcissist!Calling someone out on their bullshit is not crazy...but it's bound to happen. Narcissists
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When you care too much about your public reputation you will create a fake public persona...that is absolutely nothing like you...because you have put more importance on what people think about you than who you truly are.You can actually forget who you are and learn to live the lie that you created for yourself.You learn to believe your own lie...you
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Your experience with a Narcissist is dependent on the role YOU play in their life.You can spend as little as a month or as long as multiple decades before you find out whats really going on around you...if you ever do.You could spend your whole life in complete oblivion. That is one reason why people find it difficult to believe
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You know there always has to be one or two or three of these ANYWHERE you go...I am grateful to live in the US of A...and don't take it for granted.Having lived and traveled to many other parts of the world I have a true comparison of what life really is like outside this here United States. So being here
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Someone else's mother, father, brother, sister, child, wife, husband, lover, employee, pet, plant, in-law, out-law, friend, enemy, frenemy...THAT is not who YOU are...THAT is just a title or a label...until proven otherwise.At this point I am almost none of those things...some proven...and some otherwise.So does this make me NOTHING?***Asking for a deeper connection than a label does not make you
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Am I the lesson or are they...Does it matter...It really doesn't...The other participants don't even matter to me...It was the repetitiveness of the experience that mattered to me...The lesson was learned...by me...after being repeated over and over...by me.What we don't learn...we will repeat...in this lifetime or the next.We ALL learn differently at our own pace...With some people it's never a
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Once you mirror back to the Narcissist their behaviors...Game OVER!Once you call them out on their behaviors...Game OVER!Playing chess with someone who's playing checkers...Game OVER!Wrong game!We are not even playing the same game...Once you call a Narcissist out...You get called crazy!(Text book Narcissist)If I'm crazy...I'd rather be called crazy than being called a Narcissist!There's help for being crazy...There's absolutely no
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