Living My New Reality
Nobody is all light or all shadow.We ALL have both.We are here to learn from our shadow sides. Shadow is defined as the unconscious or disowned side of your personality. Our shadow sides are triggered by certain people...those are the people we learn from .They are sent to us to help us identify the shadow by what they trigger in
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You can change and transmute fear, anger, resentment, pain into some thing else...but you cannot change love into anything else. Love stays love...because we can't attach conditions to love. If you love someone those feelings don't go away .Love cannot be changed into hate...they are mutually exclusive...they both cannot exist at the same timeThe opposite of love is not hate
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Codependency.....trying to find an outside solution to an internal problem.People become codependent by their up bringing, by being in long term marriages...or being in controlling or dysfunctional relationships.As children we are naturally codependent on our parents...but in an unhealthy parent child dynamic the parent is codependent on the child...for constant attention and validation.These kind of children usually end up in
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Suppressing emotions over a lifetime turns our minds into a toxic self imprisonment. This behavior is perpetuated in relationships.People who are unable to feel, express or convey their emotions will suppress them out of necessity, fear of expression or habit for self preservation. This may be a learned behavior as a child...usually with parents who feel and speak for the
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The better question would be... what do we grieve?Do you know what you have allowed yourself to grieve over your lifetime? We associate grief with death.In actuality through our lifetime we go through many types of loss that go unprocessed.Sickness, divorce, breakups, leaving one's country, losing pets, losing jobs, losing friendships etc are all a type of loss.Grief is grief
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My comparison of the 2 types of pain I had to face. Losing Robbie was absolutely tragic and heart breaking.We were a part of each other's life for almost 30 years. Getting over the abusive relationship was traumatizing and took a lot of intentional effort on my part to overcome. Both grief...both pain...but both a different kind of pain. Both
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A friend of mine mentioned to me they were trying to imagine what I had gone through.Here's my answer to that.It's hard to 'imagine' unless you have experienced Narcissistic abuse yourself.It's not something a 'normal' mind can fathom or easily comprehend.That's why during the recovery stage we only share with others who have experienced the same type of abuse.It is
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A week after the Narcissist ran away...literally pushed me and ran away like a coward...my ex husband Robbie was diagnosed with Non Hodgkin's Lymphoma and came to stay with me to care for him.Ironically, he saved me but I could not save him.My friend died in April 2019 from Cancer. My life has been Divinely orchestrated for the past 5
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Narcissists have only 3 steps...love bombing, devaluation and discarding.Rinse and repeat. It doesn't matter if these steps are ALL with you or involves multiple people...it's the same 3 steps.When they are devaluing you they could be love bombing someone else.It doesn't matter if it's romantic or not...it's just a compulsive need for attention.I lived this.... Unwittingly...I did 9 cycles of
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I got divorced 5 years ago and jumped head first into a Narcissistically abusive relationship for 2.5 years...that made me rethink my WHOLE life.The End of him...was the beginning of ME. I know what happened...I was there...the abuser knows what he did...he was there...but will forever deny it and that's the reality of an abusive relationship. Ever heard an Abuser
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