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Yelling….

Yelling....poor communication.It's a learned pattern from your upbringing.Yelling is not a means of communication...When you yell...it's only a matter of time when the other person starts to yell back too...to be heard.Yelling is a cry for help...whether it's from you or the other...It's a 'LISTEN TO ME' cry for help.Yelling is not an effective way of communicating...It's a learned pattern

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Validation….

Do you need an entourage of people around you who are validating your behaviors and decisions...because you can't make your own decisions...Do they co-sign your bad decisions...Do they applaud your bad behaviors and encourage you...Those are NOT your friends...Those are people who do NOT care for your well-being.When you fall...because of your bad decisions...they will drop you like a pair

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Insanity….

By definition...Extreme foolishness or irrationality.There is a fine line between sanity and insanity....I know...I was pushed to that edge...Close enough to recognize the insanity in myself and in others...But that is the definition of a narcissistic relationship...insanity.Cognitive dissonance is the basis of this relationship...what you see and what you are told or what you tell yourself are 2 different realities...2

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Choose your words carefully….

You have not walked in my shoes...Get over it...move on...why is it taking so long...are all insensitive words to someone who is healing from betrayal/abuse/grief/death.'It takes 2 to tango' is not a viable justification to someone who has been through emotional abuse... because it ONLY takes ONE to be abusive.The same with grief ...'he is in a better place'...'he's not

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Respect, Honor and Support….

Lust or sex is not the most important ingredient in a relationship.Respect, honor, priority and support are the ingredients that make a relationship work.You can feel lust or have sex with a lot of people.The foundational basis of love is respect, honor and support.You may love as you always love... your love maybe genuine.They too will love you like they

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Broke back….

Emotionally unavailable, avoidant, dismissive, commitment phobic men...(or women)What does that look like...1. No accountability...EVER...and absolutely no commitment.Unable to commit to any future plans...including tomorrows lunch.2. Not only dwelling on exes but still making them relevant, present and more important than their present partner.3. Lack of focus on you or the relationship, moody and constantly anxious and unable to explain the

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Liminal Space….

**Liminal” comes from the Latin root word "limen," which means “threshold.” Liminal spaces are transitional or transformative spaces. They are the waiting areas between one point in time and space and the next***Liminal space...a point of no return...you can't ignore or deny what you now know. Where you are is in-between the familiar and the completely unknown.Death, abuse or any

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Jealousy…the simple truth…

Jealousy...By definition....A feeling of unhappiness caused by wanting what someone else has. Jealousy is a very dangerous ingredient when introduced into a relationship.A jealous energy will ALWAYS cause you harm...eventually...if you choose to ignore this red flag.It can be very conscious or very subconscious.Why...because they want something you have...and if they can't get it they will try to destroy it

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Against all odds…

People seem to think that those who write blogs and share material on fb or other platforms think of themselves as not having personal issues or are better than others...That is absolutely NOT true!I can only speak for myself....EVERYTHING that I write about I have experienced or am still dealing and healing from.I am able to put into words what

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Facing the music…it’s a childhood song….

Jumping from one relationship to another does not heal your core wounds that were the problem in your relationships to begin with...they just exacerbate them and hurt others.Other people cannot heal your wounds...ONLY YOU can heal your own wounds.But you sure as hell can make other people responsible for your internal problems by dragging and dumping your emotional garbage onto

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