All Inclusive trip to Hell and back….
I remember so very clearly how I felt coming out of a 2.5 year Narcissistic relationship in July of 2017.
It was an atrocious experience…
It was so very painful…I was emotionally spinning out of control…did not know which way was up down back or front.
I am usually a very grounded person…all 4 always on the ground…so to unground me takes a lot!
This experience is not something that can be repeated once you recognize this pattern.
I have experienced a number of Narcissistic Relationships…ALL damaging in slow-mo…but this one was different because of the intensity and quick acceleration of the abuse cycles…so it helped me recognize it.
ALL have a cumulative piled-on effect of repeated patterns…which requires recognition, dealing and healing.
They ALL served a purpose.
This one was ‘supposed’ to be extra jarring to give me a wake up call…because I had apparently slept through the other’s.
It took the worst possible experience to give me the best possible wake up call.
It was an abhorrent experience with a deplorable representation of this personality type.
It was all encompassing and shocking because of all the intentional underhanded fuckery.
‘Sleeping with the Enemy’…is as close as you will get to a truthful accurate description of the experience.
End of a loooong painful cycle…
The pain is long gone…and was replaced with knowledge gained and some very proud scars of resilience.
I managed to crawl out from the ditch they dug up for me and they fell into it trying to keep me there.
I had to live through it…but they have to live with it and in it…and THAT’S not an enviable place to be stuck in.
I grieved for the time lost…
I grieved for the unnecessary damage caused…
But I value the lesson…
And I celebrate my freedom from a lifelong burden of narcissistic abuse.
‘The more you know…the more you know’ is a true statement.
It was mind boggling trying to make sense out of nonsense.
It was a necessity for me to express my feelings on paper…the more I was able to understand the experience the more I was able to write…the clearer things got for me…
Me being able to write out my story and my feelings helped me process them.
So I consider myself fortunate…not everyone has that option.
I will find a way to ground myself…said the GOAT
Channeling your feelings through a creative outlet is a way of healing from Narcissistic abuse…most content creators are survivors of some kind of trauma or another.
You can ONLY speak about what you have experienced…and speaking about it is healing.
It’s a petrifying memory…
My own blog is a reminder of why it won’t be repeated.
I reread my own blog constantly…like taking inventory of my life events.
Recognizing, dealing and healing from a Narcissistic experience is not a normal break-up experience…it took effort…and time.
And I have experienced multiples…one after the other.
Buy one get 5 free!來
So what next….
More narcissists…bring ’em on m’fers!來
The worse they are…when they run away…the less burdensome life gets for me…it’s called balancing the scales ⚖️
That last one was a prototype of mass production and destruction…
I now know their kind really well and now so do you.
These people are called wolves in sheep’s clothing for a very good reason
I now indulge in ALL inclusives of a more favorable variety…a more pleasant kind of hot location 來殺
