If you have to Google people’s dysfunctional behaviors for them to make sense…you better be prepared to unravel, dissect and do an autopsy of your WHOLE life of dysfunctional relationships, family, friends…with YOU being the STAR participant.
Narcissism does not occur in a vacuum…it requires participants…YOU are that participant.
Narcissism is a dysfunctional defense mechanism.
Just like you may be an overly nice/nurturing/kind/over giving/sacrificing/martyr/over flexible/too agreeable/a door mat/over forgiving…whatever kind of person you are…you are just being yourself…right?…they too are also just being ‘themselves’.
Being ‘overly’ ANYTHING is also a dysfunctional pattern…you are using it to fill some personal need within yourself…so you find yourself engaging with people who are takers…because you are so willing wanting to give.
A giver and a taker…a perfect match made in Hell.
Once you balance out those ‘overly’ patterns…Narcissistic people will drop you like a hot potato.
They NEED your ‘overly’ ANYTHING to suck the life out of you.
It is an intense need…in them.
That’s the reason why they go in and out of relationships…they come back around because they ‘need’ what you got.
They only value your presence when they can cause you pain through negative behaviors and negative reinforcement.
They NEED what you got for their own survival…like parasites.
Once you stop feeding their need…they are gone.
People do what they know…
People love in the way they have been loved…even if it is through negative reinforcement…that’s all they know.
Survivors of emotional abuse have the capacity to heal.
Narcissistic people are not capable of any real or significant change…because that personality type is based on denial.
If you are unable to acknowledge that there is a problem…you are unable to make a change.
People can ONLY do what they already know…
When you know better…you do better…that’s the hope!
